Under My Umbrella

While the rain causes havoc to thousands across NSW, VIC and south-east Qld, it's also causing me serious anxiety travelling to and from work because I don't have an umbrella.

Correction. I did have one, but after several years of getting squashed in my handbag, wedged into my suitcase and left under dirty socks and Cherry Ripe packets in the car, my brolly has had enough of the torture and gone bye-bye.

I should've known the end was nigh when two of its silver-pointy-bits ripped through the material a few months ago. You could've poked someone's eye out with the broken prongs if you walked close enough to me and I gave it a good jab - and let me tell you I was tempted to do just that once or twice in peak hour sidewalk traffic but I let my Queen-supreme-self reign, or I'd just had a coffee so didn't feeling like killing anyone that morning. I can't remember.

Anyway, my sad little brolly finally met its maker yesterday. There I was standing in the lobby of one of Brisbane's busiest office buildings wrestling my stubborn umbrella into its closed position.

No matter how hard I tried, the stupid thing kept popping open, spraying water everwhere and narrowly missing passers-by. Because one way wouldn't work, I tried another way. Then another. It wouldn't shut.

How many bloody ways are there to collapse an umbrella? Apparently when you're desperate and holding up people trying to get in to their building, you'll think of a thousand ways to make the ridiculous invention submissive.

As reasoning with it didn't work, nor swearing at it loudly, I tempted to stand on it and push it down with my right foot. "Get in for f^#* sake!" I said through gritted teeth but just loud enough for others to know I wasn't some sort of schmuck about to lead a flash mob in a nifty performance with umbrellas. Nope, I was just an idiot who couldn't get her brolly to do one of two simple tasks it was created to do in its miserable life.

After what felt like an eternity, I finally got my umbrella to behave, stepped over the puddle of water starting to pool under my feet and ditched it.

To celebrate my freedom - and the extra space in my handbag - I've found a number of super stylish umbrellas for you to help me choose which one I should wrangle with next. Which one do you think would look great in an office lobby throw down?

Reminds me of a birdcage, but super cute.

A bloomin' eye catcher

Faux Burberry perhaps?

Practically Poppin-esque

Maybe I should keep this one on the yacht?

Tres chic

This frills me!