Sleeping Beauty: One Tired Parent Gets Sleep

Holy schmoly it's been three (yes 3!!) weeks since this Mumma put her child back to sleep without the helpful aid of Thelma and Louise, aka Mummy's Milk Bar, aka Mrs Funbags, aka Mole Hills formerly known as Mountains.

You read that correctly my dear readers, I haven't breastfed E back to sleep in three weeks and we are on track to achieve a solid 12 hours sleep - Teach and me that is!

You're all well aware of the trials and tribulations Teach and I have gone through in the past 12 months. Sleepless nights. Constant waking. Not to mention one attempt after another to cut the apron strings, give a little tough love and teach E to sleep without my help. Pffft! Silly me for trying, right? Why would E want to learn how to sleep when he had access to the 24hr Milk Bar with no running tab! It's every man's dream.

Oh, yeah! We were rockin' and rollin' all night long, hoppin' and boppin' and singin' a song. Only after weeks on end of rockin' every half hour, this Little Mumma and her Big Boppa needed to hang up their dancin' shoes and pack away E's party supplies.

But I was petrified. How on earth do I make the change? Can I stop feeding E at night immediately or do I wind it back slowly? How do I know he'll be OK?

I couldn't read any more books telling me what works for other Mothers. I appreciated hearing the various case studies, but I desperately need to talk to someone about my situation and gain tailored advice. So I contacted Jo Ryan from BabyBliss for a half hour telephone consultation and hung up feeling empowered, confident and committed to making a change.

Teach and I discussed what Jo recommended and both felt it was the best thing to do for all of us. Before we put it in motion, we told E.

I don't know why I felt this part of the process was important, but Teach and I agreed that we should prepare him as well as we could. He understands other topics we talk about like birds, cars and books so why wouldn't he comprehend that Mumma wasn't going to bring Thelma and Louise out at night anymore? I wrote down Jo's advice and over several nights (between the half hour wakes) he would hear that the end was nigh but everything would be OK. 

E took to the changes like Russell Brand takes to a pretty blonde girl. Very quickly and with 100% enthusiasm.

On the first night he obviously vented his anger and frustration, but we made our way through it and surprisingly had a good night sleep - at least four consecutive hours. Bliss!

From that moment we haven't looked back. But don't hate me just yet, E will still wake once or twice at random times during the evening, but who doesn't? It's almost as if he wakes to make sure we know he's there, then he rolls over and promptly returns to sleep like the amazing little man that he is.

Woo Hoo!! Three weeks and counting. I can feel a girls night coming on!

In all seriousness, our sincerest thanks to Jo for her support, guidance and encouragment. We couldn't have done it with out her.

I'm singin' the Sick Baby Blues

I miss my baby boy's laugh. He has been sick for several days with the standard daycare ailments all kids suffer when they start at a new child care centre. 

I was desperately hoping E would somehow manage to flash his toothy grin and fend off another round of the one-year-old flu ickies because I'm still recouperating from the last lot less than two weeks ago. Sorry, Mumma. Think again.

With his new day care seems to come a new strain of super bug that has knocked him for six. His cough is harsher (and no it's not croupe, but thanks for asking), his snot is greener and his rear has dropped more bombs in the past 48 hours than the IRA did in their hey-day. Our darling boy is so exhausted from being sick he's started to lose his voice and makes little whistling noises when he cries. It would be adorable if it wasn't so sad.

Apart from the tried and true medicinal remedies of water, baby panadol and lashings of hugs and kisses from Mum and Dad, we are simply waiting it out. Not the best option for a Gen X and Gen Y power couple. We want fast, simple and easy results now - if not sooner.

What do you do when your babies are ill? I'd like to hear your remedies to cure a baby's flu or things you've found works wonders to take their (and your own) mind off it for a short time.

Go ahead, change my nappy!

My week has been shit. Literally. 

It all started on Monday morning when E decided to crawl away mid nappy change. Waving his a adorable tooshie in my face, he darted off to explore the land of the open fridge. I let him go because I like to give him time without a nappy on so he can 'get some air'.

The fridge and it's wide open door is a new frontier for E and he often loves spending time sitting in front of it, pulling everything out and generally chillin'. Anyway, on the way to the fridge he stopped mid-crawl to study the carpet. Only I assumed he was studying the carpet because he often picks up the previous days left overs that he finds squashed in the floor. 

Not that morning. His studying face was actually one of concentration. A strong, serious, hard thought was running through his mind and (unfortunately) out of his bum! In a matter of seconds my inquisitive boy was covered in poo. 

The penny didn't drop (I might have been momentarily distracted by morning show hosts crossing to the Oscars on TV) until I saw a dirty little hand make its way to an open mouth and an intrigued tongue. 

'NO!' I yelled and shocked E into dropping his hand instantly. My poor little man got such a fright from my over reaction he started to cry. So I did what (I assume) most Mums would do in that instant - picked him up and put him in the kitchen sink for an emergency bath and avoid all unnecessary contact with the child at the same time. 

'Oooh, this is fun,' I consoled. 'La la la la. We're playing in the sink. La la la la'.  My improv song skills leave a lot to be desired at the best of times but I couldn't concentrate on writing a smash hit that very second because not only was there poo all over E, there was poo on the carpet and all over my clean sink. 

'La la la la...I think I might vomit,' I sang to no-one as I cleaned last night's dinner off E's arms, legs, feet, chin and fingers... at least I think that's what it was.

After a few minutes I got over myself, cleaned the rest of the mess up with very hot water, disinfectant and elbow grease, then lit one of my favourite vanilla scented candles to mask the smell. Done.

The next morning, mother's intuition warned me to prepare for another shitty battle. I sat E down with his favourite toy trains, several building blocks and ABC 4 Kids on tele to distract him from our impending encounter.

'Ok, Cowboy. Draw.' I whipped off E's nappy faster than he could say 'Brrrrrrrroom'. With wet wipes in one hand and a clean nappy in the other, E's cute butt was changed in less than 5 seconds.

'Boom! Now that's a nappy change. Off ya go,' I said letting E roll away after Thomas the Tank Engine. I went to the kitchen to put the kettle on. 

In what felt like no more than 15 seconds later I looked over the benchtop to see E standing up straight, holding onto the TV cabinet, naked. His little bum was free and his nappy was still lying where I had changed him. In my haste to change his nappy in record speed and safe myself from another morning of you know what, I didn't fasten the tabs on the disposalable nappy very well and it came off during E's tumble turn.

Yep, you know what's coming!!

'What are you playing with Bub?' I asked him as he bent over, swirled his hand over the carpet and started patting the nearby lamp stand. 

'E! Not again. Teach. Help!' I called out to Teach who was getting out of the shower as I launched like a missile straight towards our weapon of mass destruction (or should that be weapon of mass poo-dumption?).

This time, E thought it was hilarious and laughed all the way to the sink where he continued to splash around and squelch his smelly poo between his fingers. 

'I can't deal with this two days in a row,' I said to Teach with my t-shirt covering my mouth in a sorry attempt to stifle the smell. 'Your turn.'

I disappeared upstairs to the calming oasis of our bathroom and let Teach clean up the mess (nice, aren't I?) and only emerged once I knew the carnage was clear.

After those two acts of bottom warfare I can safely say I'll never challenge my tot's bum to a change-off again unless armed with a super-soaker and uber-powerful nappies that require a sledge hammer to remove.

E 2. Mum 0. Game Over.

E learns to play the drums

Entertaining our sick little monkey

E has been suffering from a cough and cold for the past week or two. If his nose isn't pouring like a tap, he barks up a cough loud enough to scare our neighbour's dog. Either way, there has been a never ending cycle of snot and saliva running from our little monkey at some stage during the day...and night for some time.

Despite his flu like symptoms I know in my heart of hearts that he isn't sick enough to warrant a visit to the doctor but he's too sick to risk picking up more bugs from the park or daycare, so Teach and I have been coming up with ways to keep him (and ourselves) entertained in the house.

The other day we decided to teach him how to play the drums. Homemade drums to be precise. His new instrument consisted of three stainless steel mixing bowls from the kitchen cupboard, a wooden spoon, a whisk, a saucepan lid for a symbol and a tupperware container full of rice for extra sound effects.

He had a ball discovering the many different sounds he could create. He found out which items make loud noises, which ones make really loud noises and the unbearable noise Mum makes when they are all dropped on the kitchen tiles at the same time....I'd compare the latter to a cat screaming as she gives birth to a cow. Neither pleasant nor pretty.

Following our success with the drums (and after a cup of tea to calm my nerves), Teach and I decided to slow down on the toy buying bonanza for his first birthday (just around the corner) and create a new instrument from kitchen utensils each week. I'm not sure if this decision was made more for E's enjoyment or ours, but it beats the singing the flu blues!

What have you created for your little ones to play with at home?

Life Lessons

I've said it before and I'll say it again; I believe that I've learnt more about life watching E grow than I ever would have without him. During our trip to NZ he taught me another valuable life lesson. It's pure, simple, uncomplicated and true:

Never stop learning and experimenting

As E continues to develop and discover the world around him, I too am rediscovering my world. What have I learnt so far? Don't be afraid to wrip open the vegemite packet and smear it all over the place, if that's what you want to do. Just eat it and enjoy it! Who cares about the mess, the inevitable scrubbing of the clothes to remove stains and the looks you get from people? When you follow your heart happiness generally follows and the world is a better place. 

I've printed out the above photos of E devouring his vegemite and pinned them to the board above my desk to remind me everyday to collect experiences, not posessions. After all, that is what I'll remember about my life and be thankful for at the end of the day, isn't it?

An Open Letter to 2011

Dearest 2011,

Please let me take this opportunity to express my heart-felt thanks and gratitude for coming into my life. I had a feeling we would meet one day - perhaps we met sooner than anticipated - but in the end I'm so glad we had our time together.

Well, Hark the Herald Angels! What a Week...

This week has been one of many firsts for our little family. From shopping for E's first Christmas Tree, to swims at South Bank and playing in the sprinkler, to crawling from one end of the house to the other (yes, all of us at some stage), this week has been one of great significance in our young family's life.

It started off like many others - very early and filled with endless cups of coffee from the cafe recently opened in our neighbourhood.

We decided to use this time before Christmas to do all the chores I didn't manage to get done while Teach was at work (read: forgot because lazybones here watched to many re-runs of Grey's Anatomy).

First stop: Christmas Tree! I really wanted to get into the spirit of our family Christmas, which to me means, a fabulous tree (if budget allows for it) and decorations to deck the halls.

Teach always had a real tree growing up and wanted to continue the same tradition for E, so we made our way to Hawkins to select one of their finest. Ok, maybe it wasn't their finest (how do you say 'Ka-Ching' in Tree?) but it's fine enough for our place. 

It's not the size but what you do with it that matters.

The decorations are sadly lacking, but it's the thought that counts, isn't it?

You might have noticed summer really stepped up to the plate after several days of faux winter weather this week. To celebrate (and escape our hot box) we packed the beach bag and took E to South Bank for a splash in Streets Beach. It's one of my favourite spots in Brisbane because it's close to the city, shops, cafes, galleries and other attractions, but most importantly, it's free.

E had a ball! It was one big bath tub to him. Splashing, kicking and playing. He would've stayed there for hours if the rain clouds didn't loom large and threaten to destroy our lovely afternoon.

Loving the water at Streets Beach

Inspired by his obvious love of the water, we decided to set up a sprinkler in the back garden and play under the hose like we did as kids. E was a bit shocked at this cold wet stuff splashing him in the face at first, but loved it eventually. The blow-up ball Teach was given as a Secret Santa gift came in very handy for our "pool party."

A boy always needs a ball.

Then yesterday, our little man, who has been trying to crawl for several weeks finally took off on all fours. Slowly but surely, he let one knee follow the other and crawled from Teach to me along the hallway (maybe 2m long) without looking back. It was the proudest moment of our lives!

Not wanting to finish there, a few hours later with a belly full of Mum's brilliant super-charged Boob Juice, he attempted the stairs. With Teach behind him, he went from one step to the next and climbed all the way to the top. We cheered and cheered. Once at the top, his little eyes smiled at me as if to say, 'Ta Dah! Look at me Mum,'. We couldn't stop laughing and applauding his little adventure. That reminds me, I really must buy child-proof gates for the stairs.


It's moments like these when you realise that for all the late nights, crying tantrums and pooy bums (mine and E's), you wouldn't change being a parent for anything in the world.


Merry Christmas to all.
x Sian

How Waz Ya Weekend?

Hello. How was your weekend?

Excellent! Sounds delightful.

Mine? Well, E is starting to get up on his haunches in an attempt to start crawling. By the look of his technique I think it'll still be a few weeks away yet, but it won't be long before we'll have to baby-proof the house, re-arrange furniture, books, magazines, kitchen appliances etc... to make it more child friendly. Eeek!

We've also got internal stairs in our place, so the task of setting up child-proof gates at each end will not yield favourable results. I can NEVER work those useless things!

Yes, I'm a fun-size adult, but an adult nonetheless. You'd think I'd learn after the second or third attempt to open the wretched gate (friends of mine have them and I HATE, yes HATE, the sight of them), I could just climb over it instead of standing there fidgeting with the awful, never-bloody-works latch, making a complete fool of myself. Knowing my luck, E will catch me trying to open it one day, pull himself up and flick it open with his tiny little fingers just like he's learnt to turn the television on an off.  Grrrr...

Unfortunately my baby boy has had a bad fever for the past few days and taken the opportunity to live each day in a wonderful I-Only-Want-To-Be-Held-By-Mother mood. So I'm afraid this post comes to you with a serving of deep fried Energy Levels, a super sized cup of Can I Give a Damn and a delicious side order of Get What You're Given and Like It - a meal Teach is not fond of at all...I wonder why?!

To make it up to you, please enjoy this visual feast I have lovingly...cough...prepared.

Tea cup in a frame...Adorable.

Clever framing.

Yummy

This would make great wallpaper for E's room.

It's no longer Winter, but I could really go a hug mug of goodness right now!

In Other News: Anyone who previously subscribed to receive emails when this blog was titled 'Be Lost in Thought' will need to resubscribe to 'This Beautiful Life'. My apologies for any inconvenience.

Best,
Sian x

All Aboard the Workforce Express!

I've been on maternity leave since December last year, even though E wasn't due until February. I decided to take off early in order to wind down from work, have Christmas at home with family and enjoy the last few weeks of my pregnancy at home nesting. 

While the year is almost up. It feels like it has gone by in the blink of an eye.

When E first arrived I would sit with him and think, 'Imagine the day when you'll sit up by yourself.'

Then I would say to Teach, 'Just wait until he's crawling around, we won't know what hit us.'

Now, I'm thinking (and somewhat pleading to the heavens), 'Where's my baby gone? He's such a little man now,' and he's only 8 months old.

Being able to stay at home and care for E in his first year has been incredible, for him and me. We've definitley had our moments of desperation, exhaustion and frustration (especially on my behalf) but I wouldn't change our time together for anything. I'm very grateful that Teach and I have been able to afford the luxury of me not working...until now.

Yep, the time has come for me to haul my tired arse back to the work force, but it goes with a degree of anxiety and confusion because it's taken me a good part of the year to forget Career Girl Sian and comfortably settle into Mumma mode. How do I mix-it-up and do both? 

Yesterday, I joined the other Yummy Mummys at our weekly Mothers Group catch up. A majority of us are passengers on the Workforce Express boat so the conversation consisted of many personal questions such as: Would you recommend Child Care or Family Day Care? Should I look for vacancies in a centre near home or work? What sort of standards are we searching for? What is a good benchmark to compare child care centres? What is the average cost for one child per week? Does anyone know of a centre that is happy for you to use cloth nappies?

The one burning question I had, that I didn't voice was, how the hell will I cope not looking after E each day?


It was incomprehensible to me one year ago that I could survive as a Stay-at-Home Mum. I thought I would  'lose myself' in Motherly duties and go a bit batty (more so than usual that is). But it seems the opposite is true.

I love being the main carer for E during the day. We play adorable little games that no-one else knows. We sing songs together that no-one else knows (Ok, I sing and he just nods along). We go to the park, to weekly Baby Sensory classes, Mother's Group and on shopping expeditions.

I know his little idiosyncrasies and he knows mine - maybe better than Teach? Yes, we have our moments like many others do, but I sincerely cherish this time we've had together and I know I will miss it - I completely understand now what people mean when they say 'This time goes so fast'. Fast? It's bloody lightning speed and I'm holding on for dear life!!

Needless to say, SJP's new movie I Don't Know How She Does It is very timely. I might need to organise a Mother's Group catch up at a Babes in Arms session to watch, listen and learn what to do and what not to do.    

If you have any tips on how to cope with this transition, I'd love to hear it.

Sleep Training: One Tired Parent's Diary - Part Two

Well it seems our endeavour to teach E how to self-settle during the night has ended before it really began...

I'm not sure if it was my initial resistance (covered by cocky confidence), levels of anxiety or desire to sleep and 'deal with it later' that overcame me, but I woke up today vowing to find another solution. Anything must be better than hearing my darling boy cry. In short, I gave up.

Sleep Training: One Tired Parent's Diary

After more than four months of E's constant night waking - ranging from every 4 hours to every hour - Teach and I have decided to try and teach E to self-settle during the night.

Self-settling is also referred to as Controlled Crying (CC), Crying it Out (CIO), Sleep Training (ST) and Controlled Comforting (again CC). No matter what you want to call it, it's a controversial subject. Many wise women before me *cough* have prepared papers on the pros and cons of CC, some declaring it causes psychological harm on the child and instils a sense of abandonment. Others say allowing a baby to cry and fall asleep on their own (without being fed, rocked, nursed etc...) will not harm them in and infact could teach children resilience.

Shopping made easy for men

The school holidays brings a sense of excitment to our lives because it means Teach is on holidays too and he can spend more time with E during the day - when he's at his most playful - and me - who tends to be slightly nicer before exhaustion sets it around 5pm when he usually gets home. Unfortunately, school holidays also means other children and their parents are on holidays too. This brings a sense of fear and trepidation to my life...especially when I have to go shopping!

Happy Father's Day Baby. I'd kill for a cuppa!

In preparation for Father’s Day this Sunday I’ve been trying to plan something special for Teach. I attempted to mark the occasion last year but seeing E (or ‘Grug’ as he was known during the gestational period) wasn’t born yet my efforts were more comical than serious. 

A giggle for your Wednesday...

 

I have to thank my Dad for sending me this fabulous cartoon. Sums up our life nicely I think.

Best,
Sian x

5 Signs Of Sleep Deprivation

The online medical dictionary Web MD defines sleep deprivation as: a sufficient lack of restorative sleep over a cumulative period so as to cause physical or psychiatric symptoms and affect routine performances of tasks.